So it’s finally 2019. We are one week into this year already and we bet you haven’t followed through with any of your New Years Resolutions. We at Buzzfe… um I mean… Goldfire Media want to tell all white liberals what they could do better in 2019.

1. Stop making articles where you collectively demonise an entire race whilst claiming to be anti racist. You may be a white liberal who does none of the below. You may feel a little misjudged by this article. Well in that case, stop calling all conservatives and white people racist.

2. Understand that being anti white creates more white supremacists. For whatever reason you have for being anti white, you are ultimately making it not ok to be white. It’s textbook racism when the BBC makes job advertisements saying that white people need not apply. This is the stuff that can create white supremacists within poor white communities where minors can feel left out – especially in countries where ‘refugees’ (whom 98% of which are men 18-40) can receive free housing and large cheques each month.

3. Stop acting like you own minority groups. Just because your gay black neighbour voted for a right wing party doesn’t mean he’s an Uncle Tom. He has every right to disagree with your politics.

4. Explain your beliefs, don’t force them. Have you ever met a salesman who bullied you into buying a car? Has he said that you are literally Hitler for not driving the car he’s selling you? It doesn’t happen. You cannot sell your idea by calling the person you’re selling it to a Nazi.

5. Stop calling everyone Nazis. When you call a Trump supporter a ‘Nazi white supremacist bigot’ then it actually makes people who actually hold white supremacist beliefs look harmless. People will then start identifying them with Trump supporters. Try shouting in the faces of a white supremacist group, you’re going to get badly hurt.

6. Stop throwing temper tantrums in public. It’s embarrassing for you and it really doesn’t help your case in political arguments.

7. Stop trying to overturn democratic elections because you didn’t like the results. The best examples of this would be the 2016 US election and Brexit. You cannot live in a democracy and have second elections.

8. If you live in the US, Trump is your president. If you don’t like it, leave. Or maybe offer alternative working solutions to the country’s problems but a certain level of IQ is needed to do that.

9. Stop being so ignorant over Brexit. If you are a white liberal from the UK, you are probably supporting the politicians who are looking to undermine Brexit because ‘it’s controlled by the elite’. If this was true then why are the elite trying to bring Brexit down? And why are you siding with Tony Blair? – This brings us to our next point.

10. Being pro war. Why are you white liberals suddenly so excited to go to war with Syria? You guys used to be so anti war and now you actually don’t mind it. Where was the outrage where Obama’s was fuelling 6 different wars and dropping over 20,000 bombs a year on the Middle East? Also you guys forgived war criminal’s like Tony Blair, George W Bush and John McCain very easily when you took their side because they also hated Trump.

11. Stop almost destroying the world by almost starting WWIII all the time. I don’t just mean nearly electing Hillary Clinton as President of the United States, I mean Hollywood too. Do you remember Seth Rogen’s film ‘The Interview’? If you don’t recall then the film was about two reporters being sent to North Korea to kill Kim Jong Un. Kim Jong Un responded in real life by threatening to bomb every cinema in the US that shows that movie. The movie went straight to DVD, Hollywood essentially risked the wellbeing of the American people by releasing that film. Ironically enough, Seth Rogen was extremely critical of President Trump by tweeting that he was going to start WWIII.

12. Old people are not ruining your future. When your grandparents vote for a right wing party, it’s not because they are a bunch of racist 1950’s throwbacks. Today’s old people have either witnessed war or have had parents or loved ones directly involved in war, whether it was WWII or Vietnam or one of the lesser known wars of that time.

13. The army has a very strict code when it comes to who can serve. Please do not try to bully the army into accepting mentally unstable people, this makes the army less efficient and lowers army protocol.

14. Stop calling yourself woke because you have a vague understanding what socialism is and how you’d like to bring it back.

15. Being between the ages of 18-35 does not mean your generation is owed something. Life is hard for everyone, just be grateful you have the first world opportunities you have and make the best of it.

16. Reading tons of books about Socialism and Marxism doesn’t make you smart, it just means you’ve heavily revised one side of the argument. You’re still going to get destroyed in a debate because you haven’t revised the other side of the argument.

17. Stop watching CNN, MSNBC and other fake news sources. If you hate the elite so much, why do you watch their news networks? Project Veritas proved CNN to be completely fake, when even their employees admit their Trump/Russia narrative was completely made up.

18. Stop thinking Trump can be impeached. You’ve already tried that and you failed. Also why do you guys think Robert Mueller is going to lock Trump away? Mueller is never going to put Trump in prison, I don’t know how you guys came to that conclusion. He’s been digging for 2 years now and he’s found absolutely nothing.

19. Stop obsessing over the gender pay gap. It’s illegal in the first world to pay someone less for the same amount of work because of their gender. Do the slightest bit of research and you’ll figure this out.

20. Stop taking all your news and opinions from celebrities. Celebrities are paid to go on chat shows and talk about race and hate and the political climate like they’re the experts.

21. Neck beards. Just stop it. It’s disgusting. The wirey pubic hair growing out of your neck folds doesn’t make you look older or more distinguished, it makes you look like someone who doesn’t know how to shave.

22. Soya products. Ever wondered why you have manboobs and why you act so effeminate? To those who aren’t leftists, leftists love soy products. Soy products contain a high amount of oestrogen, which is a female hormone. This has been proven to make men act more like women. This includes effeminate behaviour, higher pitch voice, very low testosterone levels, female hormonal growth (like manboobs) and an extremely emotional state of mind. 

23. Extremely skinny jeans. Skinny jeans are ok to some extent, but the skinny jeans you white liberal men wear are ball-crushing. Please choose something less destructive (and preferably more masculine too – which brings us to our next point).

24. Stop saying there are more than 2 genders. You cannot change biology.

25. Stop ruining films and TV shows. People go to watch movies and TV to get away from politics, not to listen to your virtue signalling.

26. Stop sharing posts and articles from Buzzfeed. If only you could see how much of a tool you are, you would stop. Nobody cares if you happen to like the vegan dish Buzzfeed prepared online.

27. Drop phrases like ‘I cannot even’, ‘this is so me’, ‘literally shaking’, ‘slayyyyy queeeen’, ‘OMG YASS’, ‘Who hurt you sweetie?’ , ‘OMG it is [insert current year] and you are this bigoted?’ and unironically calling the person you are debating ‘honey bun’ or ‘sweetie’. 

28. Being politically correct. If a comedian makes a joke over minorities, it is always the white liberals who get offended the most. Minority communities do not need white liberals to speak for them. So stop getting offended so easily, nobody cares.

29. Giving empathy to those who don’t deserve it. White liberals love to defend MS-13 and the Islamic state. Are you just too stupid to see how dangerous these people are or do you just want the western world to be cleansed of white people?

30. Your self hatred. There’s nobody who white liberals hate more than white people. Also the white guilt and self hatred of the white liberals are also fuelled by the fact that deep down they know they live pathetic lives. More people than ever are on anti depressants, and those people are mostly liberals. It’s amazing how you can be the establishment and want to kill yourself.

If you enjoyed this article, please share with your liberal friends. If you are a white liberal and you hated this article, please write a complaint letter and put it in the bin – I’m sure I’ll receive it.

By Damien Taylor